No pain, no gain applies to happiness

People who work hard at improving a skill or ability, such as mastering a math problem or learning to drive, may experience stress in the moment, but experience greater happiness on a daily basis and longer term.

"No pain, no gain is the rule when it comes to gaining happiness from increasing our competence at something. People often give up their goals because they are stressful, but we found that there is benefit at the end of the day from learning to do something well. And what''s striking is that you don''t have to reach your goal to see the benefits to your happiness and well-being," said Ryan Howell, assistant professor of psychology at San Francisco State University.

The study found that people who engage in behaviours that increase competency, for example at work, school or the gym, experience decreased happiness in the moment, lower levels of enjoyment and higher levels of momentary stress.

Despite the negative effects felt on an hourly basis, participants reported that these same activities made them feel happy and satisfied when they looked back on their day as a whole.

The surprising finding suggests that in the process of becoming proficient at something, individuals may need to endure temporary stress to reap the happiness benefits associated with increased competency.

The study examined whether people who spend time on activities that fulfil certain psychological needs, believed to be necessary for growth and well being, experience greater happiness.

In addition to the need to be competent, the study focused on the need to feel connected to others and to be autonomous or self-directed, and it examined how fulfilling these three needs affects a person's happiness moment by moment within a day.

While behaviours that increase competency were linked with decreased happiness in the moment, people who spent time on activities that met the need for autonomy or feeling connected to others experienced increased happiness on both an hourly and daily basis.

The greatest increase in momentary happiness was experienced by participants who engaged in something that met their need for autonomy-any behaviour that a person feels they have chosen, rather than ought to do, and that helps them further their interests and goals.

The authors suggest that shifting the balance of needs met in a day could help people find ways to cope with short-term stress in the workplace.

"Our results suggest that you can decrease the momentary stress associated with improving your skill or ability by ensuring you are also meeting the need for autonomy and connectedness, for example performing the activity alongside other people or making sure it is something you have chosen to do and is true to who you are," said Howell.

Time for Coffee with Friend

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the story of an empty jar and the 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large empty jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks until the top of the jar.He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was! So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed."Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, " I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things - your health, your family, your partner, your children, your friends, your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff.If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal"Take care of the rocks first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

Australianism means single-minded determination to win

5th Match of India-Australia ODI series 2007 has gone to Australia..

Congrats Australia, a team battered with injuries has hung on for a memorable win.. Sixty one years ago, at the end of a tour of England by Don Bradman's famous pack, John Arlott put it thus: "Australianism," wrote Arlott, "means single-minded determination to win - to win within the laws but, if necessary, to the last limit within them. It means where the 'impossible' is within the realm of what the human body can do, there are Australians who believe that they can do it - and who have succeeded often enough to make us wonder if anything is impossible to them. It means they have never lost a match - particularly a Test match - until the last run is scored or their last wicket down."

Spare a thought for Sachin Tendulkar. He seemed to have done everything possible but didn't last the final lap. That will really hurt him no doubt but that's that. Australia go ahead in the series.

Milan Beeka: "ODI no. 2923 will always be remembered for Sachin- 17 000 runs and a knock for the ages, Marsh's maiden century and the Australian spirit for winning against all odds! What a true spectacle.:

Hang on for the quotes from the post-match ceremony

Dhoni: "They got off to a good start and we never got into a postion to contain them. It was up to us to chase it. We got a good start and we came in the end due to Tendulkar and Raina. We lost it in our mental calculation, not because of our talent. It was one of the good ODI tracks we have seen in India, you have to be smart. Hopefully we will be up for the next two games."

Ponting " It was one of the amazing games and certainly one of the best innings ever from Sachin. You just have to keep hanging in there, you just have tell your bowlers to keep bowling to the plan. just one bad shot and we could come in but Sachin didn't play many bad shots today! Its really unbelievable how we have played, considering al the injuries. Marsh played realy well.:"

Man of the Match is Sachin Tendulkar: "I thought we started off really well then lost wickets. Suresh and I had a good partnership but in the end, it was disappointing. yeah It was one of my best knocks, the pressure to keep scoring runs was there and we took it very close. I thought Suresh has a terrific talent; he can play the big shots, so if we can get the partnership going, and with powerplay left, the game can go anyway. I care about playing for India, it's a passion and I have been absoloutely honoured to play for India so long."